Break-up Song: Verse 1- ‘The Twilight of Love,’ as Anthony Kiedis Puts It
Written Between Wednesday, November 8th 2023 and Thursday, June 27th, 2024
Sometimes….I wondered if it would be best to forget all about our special love story, lest the nostalgia… might unbalance me and tempt me to intend to win her back again… you know, like in all those endings to romantic Hollywood movies we sometimes cried and laughed through together. However, cliche as it might seem to say, if I don’t remember, then those hard karmic lessons would remain unlearned.
Sometimes I missed her, cried a lot…
(Those damn love songs relentlessly haunting me as I stock produce at the grocery store, memories like massive spaces, fields of thick summer humidity seeming to embody me…I’m thinking of “When It’s Over” by Sugar Ray: “…that’s the time I fall in love again…all the songs we used to sing, our favorite tv shows…”)
And I wondered if there was some way to give it another try, and honor the promises we made and broke… you know, “I will always love you,” as Whitney Houston sings or as it goes in “Love Song” by 311… beautiful songs, aren’t they? …Yes, all those promises that…. I ….made and broke…(god I was such an energetic mess of a bloke!)…I eventually realized it would probably be wise to … “let her go.”
“Say goodbye, my love, I can see it in your soul…let your lover sail,” as Anthony Kiedis sings.
Falling in love and breaking up both seem to happen so…. naturally. (Thinking of the Red Hot Chili Peppers song “It’s Only Natural” … when Anthony Kiedis sings: “nobody knows just when lightning will strike but it always came” and from “Breaking the Girl” when he sings “feeling so good that day, a feeling of love that day” and then “I don’t know what, when, or why but the twilight of love had arrived”)… the twilight of love… had arrived… the twilight of love…ooh…I feel that one!
We fell in love so thoroughly and deeply, it was a major quantum leap, and then we broke up the same way…, another quantum leap, and then another… as we both found our peace, no hard feelings…all of it happened so naturally, emotionally, mystically…and yet so karmically as I recall the seeds I planted in the form of “if you can’t love yourself, you can’t love someone else,” so to speak.
I feel tinges of sad nostalgia and amusement as I remember when my former dear and I used to love that line from the Of Montreal song “The Past is a Grotesque Animal”… when he sings “The past is a grotesque animal and in its eyes you see…how completely wrong you can be, how completely wrong you can be”… I listen to it again for the first time in so long I can’t remember…and I cry…and contemplate montages of our love story, trying for as little bias as I can…